INT. CLASSROOM - DAY
Pentagon is telling a brief history of the Shapelands for his school project. Animated drawings are moving about as he talks.
PENTAGON
(dramatically)
Once upon a time, there was a land. A land of much diversity. A land where everyone lived in peace, a land where everyone lived in order. That place is what we call our home, the Shapelands. Circles, Pentagons, Triangles alike, we all lived in harmony. We were all being protected by our government, as they have kept us in order for the last millenia. All were happy, except a select few… That select few believed in a harsher reality, and so, a war broke out. Many were injured, many suffered, and many died. However, our people came on top, and our enemies were soon banished, never to be seen again. Nobody knows the whereabouts or the identities of these shapes, as they have been completely shut out by the government. Could there be more information? Yes, but it’s highly unlikely. They were likely just people who wanted a selfish reality for themselves. But now, we live back in harmony.
The piece of paper containing all the drawings moves away from the screen, revealing Pentagon at the front of the classroom, in front of the whiteboard.
APPLAUSE
CIRCLE
Awesome, Pentagon! Looks like someone’s been paying attention in History class.
Pentagon walks back to his desk.
CIRCLE
Alright, our next presenter is none other than Triangle!
TRIANGLE
Ugh, fine.
Triangle lazily gets up from her desk and walks to the front of the classroom.
TRIANGLE
I want to discuss a common topic for all students alike, a common hatred that we all have. Which is the building we are in right now. School. You see, I’ve never liked school, and I think all of you can agree with me. We stay in this place for the majority of our day, just to learn about topics we would never use in our daily lives. For example, my life outside of school has NOTHING to do with finding the value of x, knowing the anatomy of whatever a fish is, or learning about an “ancient language” that we don’t even use anymore! I literally work at a fast food restaurant. It’s sad. I’m sad. So, with the help of a friend of mine, I’m gonna get rid of this stupid place.
Hexagon, at her desk, starts to weirdly smile.
TRIANGLE
That’s your cue, Hexagon.
Hexagon pulls out a red button and presses it. A robotic voice coming from the button starts to count down.
BUTTON
Three. Two. One.
Nothing seems to happen. Triangle, still at the front of the room, seems worried.
TRIANGLE
(quietly)
Uh… Hexagon, why hasn’t this place been blown to smithereens yet???
HEXAGON
(quietly)
I don’t know! I’m not good at this kind of stuff! I just like blowing things up, not setting this elaborate plan!
TRIANGLE
Ugh… Whatever. Uh… And that’s my hypothetical speech if I ever… Hated school… Yeah.
APPLAUSE COMING FROM ONLY PENTAGON
Triangle goes to her desk and sits down.
CIRCLE
Well, Triangle, that certainly was an… interesting topic. Anyways, moving on, Rhombus, you’re up next.
Rhombus gets up and confidently walks to the front of the room.
RHOMBUS
You know, I was GOING to do a presentation on how climate change is affecting the ecosystem, but I have a different topic now. And that is the fact that Triangle’s speech is completely inappropriate and unsuited for a learning environment!
Triangle looks irritated.
RHOMBUS
First of all, her topic completely goes against the school’s code of conduct! Bombs and school demolition pose a potential threat to the safety of all staff and students! Like, if that explosion actually did happen at the end of Triangle’s presentation, then we would all probably be seriously injured or worse by n-
OVAL
(while Rhombus is talking)
Um, Square? Is it just me or do you hear a sizzling sound?
SQUARE
(unsure)
Uhh…
GIGANTIC EXPLOSION
The school explodes so violently that it looks and sounds like a nuke.
FADE OUT:
EXT. SNOW-CAPPED MOUNTAIN - DAY
Rectangle is shown laying on top of snow, half-conscious, like she was just violently thrown through the air.
RECTANGLE
Ugh… What… happened?
Rectangle stands up and sees the rest of the class slowly waking up.
RECTANGLE
Everyone okay?
SOME SHAPES
Yeah.
Square, now standing up, scans the snow-covered environment.
SQUARE
Where are we..?
Oval also looks around for clues to where he and the class are.
OVAL
Hm… Judging by the snow, we’re probably high up on a mountain.
OCTAGON
How the heck did we get this far from the school?!
HEXAGON
(behind Octagon)
Well, to answer that Octagon, the bombs I used were the biggest, most powerful explosives in the entire universe!
OCTAGON
You really hated school that much, huh? (small pause) Wait, then how are we even still alive-
Hexagon peers over to Triangle, still on the ground, but awake.
TRIANGLE
Wh- why are you looking at me?!
HEXAGON
You’re the one that said to use the “craziest bombs money can buy”! And I take this stuff seriously.
While Hexagon is talking, Triangle gets up and walks closer to Hexagon.
TRIANGLE
(angrily)
I didn’t mean it literally!
RHOMBUS
(complaining)
Well great. Now I’m stuck on top of a mountain with these idiots!
OCTAGON
What did you just call me?
INDISTINCT ARGUING
CIRCLE
GUYS! I’m sure we can find a way down, we just need to assess our surroundings first-
An unknown individual in front of the group takes a dramatic step in their direction.
CIRCLE
(scared)
… Who are-
HOST
Hello! Welcome to… FLABBERGASTED PEAKS!
The camera zooms out, showing the entire mountain (and more) while Host is saying “flabbergasted peaks”.
RHOMBUS
Yeah cool. Now that we’ve been properly welcomed, do you know how to get us down from here?
HOST
Aw, leaving so soon? I was about to invite you to my reality show, taking place right here!
Hexagon emerges from the crowd, now eager to hear what Host has to say.
HEXAGON
(excited)
Oooh! Reality show!? Consider me in!
CIRCLE
Now wait, what is this “reality show” even going to be about?
HOST
I’m not going to spare all the details just yet, but if you win, you can get the power to control all of the Shapelands!
Oval, crossing his arms, now looks at Host, looking intrigued.
OVAL
… All of it?
HOST
Yeah, ALL OF IT! So what are y’all waiting for?!
EVERYONE EXCEPT HOST
Yeah!
OPENING ANIMATION
INT. CONFESSIONAL ROOM - DAY
For a second, Triangle, not knowing that she just magically teleported into a room, stands there looking at a random spot.
Finally, she notices that she is not where she was three seconds ago.
TRIANGLE
Huh? Where am I- Oh, I think I know what this is. A confessional!
Another couple seconds pass as Triangle is still assessing the situation she is in.
TRIANGLE
Uh… I don’t think I’m supposed to be here right now… The competition hasn’t even started.
Triangle anxiously waits for something to happen.
TRIANGLE
(anxiously)
How do I get out?
SNOW-CAPPED MOUNTAIN - DAY
Host is talking to all the contestants, including the now traumatized Triangle.
HOST
Now I’m sure all of you are eager to know the logistics of this comp-
TRIANGLE
(frightened)
How did you put me in that room?!
RECTANGLE
What are you talking about?
TRIANGLE
(fast-paced)
I- I don’t know, I think it was a room for confessionals but I was just magically brought there in an instant and I didn’t know what to do and I-
HOST
Oh yeah, I was just testing that system out. You were just the lucky one I chose.
TRIANGLE
Well you could have at least WARNED ME!
HOST
Uh… This is how the game will work!
Camera moves up into the sky and animated drawings appear to aid in the communication of how the game will work.
HOST
First of all, there will be no teams. Instead, I will put you into randomly assigned groups every challenge. Those groups will either face each other or work together to win immunity! Secondly, everyone will vote for one of the contestants up for elimination after each contest!
OVAL
Let me get this straight. WE’RE voting? ‘Cause usually the viewers are the ones that vote.
HOST
What viewers?
OVAL
… Nevermind.
HOST
Well that pretty much sums up the logistics so-
PENTAGON
Ooh what’s the first challenge?! I can’t wait to start!
HOST
That’s what I was about to say, uhh… Hexa… circle..?
PENTAGON
Pentagon, Sir-
HOST
Pentagon! The first challenge is to race someone down the mountain to the finish line, which is at the entrance of Harassment Hills!
Camera swiftly moves down to spot the finish line in Harassment Hills.
CIRCLE
(sassy)
Why is it called “Harassment Hills”?
HOST SHRUGS
RECTANGLE
Square and I volunteer to be the first ones going d-
HOST
Hold up just one second! I said that the groups would be RANDOM.
RECTANGLE
Aw man. Well hopefully we get put together, Square!
SQUARE
… Yeah.
HOST
Thankfully I have a sweet invention to do the randomizing for me!
Host pulls out a cool screen device with the text “RANDOMIZER 2000” on the top.
HOST
All I have to do is press this button and it randomly selects two contestants!
Host presses the button and the RANDOMIZER 2000 starts computing.
CIRCLE
How does it know that we’re contestants?
HOST
Oh Rectangle-
CIRCLE
Circle.
HOST
(chill)
Oh Circle, you ask too many questions. You’re just eager to compete. I bet you hope the randomizer picks you to be in the first pair!
CIRCLE
Oh please, I would do anything to go last-
The RANDOMIZER 2000 finishes computing and two shapes appear on the screen.
RANDOMIZER 2000
Circle and Trapezoid.
HOST
And it looks like our first pair is Circle and Trapezoid! Good thing this randomizer says your names for me. I don’t have to play the guessing game all the time!
Circle blankly stares into the snow while Host is rambling.
HOST
Alright!
Host draws a starting line in the snow with his leg.
HOST
Are you two ready?
Circle and Trapezoid line up at the starting line.
CIRCLE
(depressed)
Ready as I’ll ever be.
Trapezoid–behind Circle in this certain camera angle–looks at Host and blinks.
HOST
Go!
Circle and Trapezoid start running down at approximately the same speed.
MIDDLE OF MOUNTAIN - DAY
Circle and Trapezoid are still running down the mountain side by side at the same speed.
CIRCLE
Don’t get your hopes too high, Trapezoid. You’re fast, but you’re not an adult, or a qualified teacher!
Trapezoid puts on a confused look.
CIRCLE
Wh- of course I’m qualified! Just you wait; I’m going to get down and win without hitting a single obstacle!
Trapezoid moves a couple steps away from Circle as he spots a big rock in the way. They both continue to run down.
CIRCLE
Why are you moving away, Trapezoid? Just scared that I would do something? I mean, I certainly could, but as an adult and qualified teacher that would be just r-
SLAM
Circle slams into a big rock while Trapezoid does not. Trapezoid runs all the way down the mountain into the finish line.
FINISH LINE - DAY
Trapezoid stops once he has crossed the finish line, looking back up at where he started.
HOST
(echoed, loud, clear)
GOOD JOB, TRAPEZOID!
A cinematic view of the entire mountain takes place, showing just how loud that congrats was. It zooms out to a tower high in the sky for a couple seconds, with someone looking at where the voice is coming from.
Trapezoid turns around, walks over to the side of the finish line, and simply sits down.
SNOW-CAPPED MOUNTAIN - DAY
HOST
So Circle is up for elimination!
Oval looks down to see Circle still at the rock, now unconscious.
OVAL
(to Triangle)
That was… sad to say the least.
TRIANGLE
Tell me about it. Imagine if something like that happens to me when I’m up!
HOST
Well I think it’s time to choose the next pair!
Host presses the button on the RANDOMIZER 2000 and the RANDOMIZER 2000 starts to compute.
HEXAGON
Is there a way you can speed it up or something? We’re wasting all this time waiting for this slow machine!
Hexagon whacks the RANDOMIZER 2000. It causes the RANDOMIZER 2000 to immediately select two contestants. Hexagon looks at it and Host for a second.
HEXAGON
(shocked)
What did I just do..?
HOST
You pressed the speed up button, silly!
HEXAGON
You didn’t think of pressing that before?
HOST
I just wanted the suspense, you know?
Hexagon glares at Host for a second.
HOST
Uh- well the next pair is Rhombus and Octagon!
RHOMBUS
Hmph! This is going to be easy.
INT. CONFESSIONAL ROOM - DAY
RHOMBUS
I’m surely going to win. I mean, I’m a couple of years older than him, I have better grades than him in school, and he doesn’t even have arms! Well, You do grow arms around the age of ten, but he’s already ten! I grew my arms when I was nine! That just PROVES I’m better, and therefore, I am going to win!
EXT. SNOW-CAPPED MOUNTAIN - DAY
OCTAGON
(angrily)
What makes you say that, HUH?
RHOMBUS
Because I just KNOW I’m going to win. You don’t even have arms!
OCTAGON
What does that have to do with anything?!
RHOMBUS
That just proves that I’m simply better than you!
OCTAGON
I’ll show you! Just watch.
Octagon puts on a confident expression.
HOST
Go!
Rhombus and Octagon zoom off.
MIDDLE OF MOUNTAIN - DAY
Rhombus is at a slight lead which makes Octagon look agitated. He then suddenly leaps into the air and tucks his legs in, in a way that makes it so that he can roll down the mountain.
It boosts Octagon and gets him in the lead!
RHOMBUS
WHAT?!
OCTAGON
(excited, loud)
Who’s better now?!
Rhombus gives Octagon a devilish frown and speeds up to the best of her ability.
OCTAGON
I can see the finish line! I’m almost there!
Octagon hits a small pebble which causes him to be flinged up. He faceplants close to the finish line, but before he can get up, Rhombus passes him and crosses the finish line (also where Trapezoid is sitting).
OCTAGON
What?! No!
RHOMBUS
Who’s better now?! Hahaha!
OCTAGON
Grr!!!
SNOW-CAPPED MOUNTAIN - DAY
HOST
GOOD JOB RHOMBUS-
OVAL
Maybe you shouldn’t do that every time… I think I’m starting to go death.
HOST
Good point… Well our next pair is…
WHACK
The RANDOMIZER 2000 swiftly picks two contestants.
RANDOMIZER 2000
Oval and Pentagon.
HOST
You heard the RANDOMIZER! Line up at the starting line you two!
Oval and Pentagon walk up to the starting line.
OVAL
Uh, hey.
PENTAGON
Hello Mr. Oval! Good luck on the race! I’m sure you’ll do good!
OVAL
Heh. Thanks. You too.
INT. CONFESSIONAL ROOM - DAY
OVAL
… Huh? Oh. A confessional. Well, I don’t have much to say other than, I don’t really care who wins this one. I mean, Pentagon’s just a nice guy and I would like to get to know him more during this game. He’s one of the newer students, only coming in with us about a week ago–and the youngest–but he’s been excelling in pretty much everything he does. He kind of reminds me of my… Uh, so with that being said, I kind of want him to win this challenge. I’ll just run a bit slower than him.
EXT. MOUNTAIN - DAY
HOST
Go!
Oval and Pentagon start their race. Oval acts like he’s running and pretends that Pentagon is too fast for him. He smiles at Pentagon as he excitedly runs down the mountain at full speed.
INT. CONFESSIONAL ROOM - DAY
HEXAGON
Why is the Host only doing these confessionals right now??? Well, let’s just say… I have a bit of a surprise coming for when I go. I would hate to be paired with someone like Triangle, my… “partner in crime”. If that does happen, she’ll just have to face my wrath like she did when the school went kablooey! … Yeah.
FINISH LINE - DAY
Pentagon crosses the finish line with Oval trailing behind.
PENTAGON
(humbly)
Oh– looks like I won! But it was close! Good game, Oval!
OVAL
Yeah, good game Pentagon..!
EXT. SNOW-CAPPED MOUNTAIN - DAY
HOST
That did seem close… Almost like Oval was purposefully letting Pentagon win… Meh. It doesn’t really matter. At least nobody cheated!
HEXAGON
(surprised)
You can hear them from all the way down there?
HOST
Uh, yeah? You can’t?
HEXAGON
Of course not!
HOST
Wow. Interesting. Well I think it’s time to announce the second to last pair! (Which will also reveal the last one!)
Right before Host presses the button, he retracts his arm and goes for the speed up button.
HOST
Maybe we should use the slow mode, you know, for dramatic effect!
Camera focuses on the RANDOMIZER 2000, which slowly picks the second to last pair.
RANDOMIZER 2000
Hexagon and Triangle.
HOST
And there we go!
HEXAGON
Oh. Well this is going to be fun nonetheless!
TRIANGLE
What do you mean by that..?
HEXAGON
Oh nothing, I’m just excited for the race!
RECTANGLE
Well would you look at that, Square! We’re paired together!
SQUARE
(depressed)
Yeah.
RECTANGLE
Scared of losing, huh? Well I’ll let you win, Square, don’t worry!
SQUARE
Great…!
HOST
Alright! Line up at the start!
When Hexagon and Triangle line up, Hexagon starts grinning. Triangle takes note of this and gives a confused, concerned look at Hexagon.
HOST
Go!
EXT. MIDDLE OF MOUNTAIN - DAY
Triangle sees this as a friendly race rather than a fierce competition.
TRIANGLE
Oh, you’re going down, Hexagon!
HEXAGON
I don’t think so!
TRIANGLE
What is that supposed to mean- WOAH!
A bomb flies over Triangle’s head, almost hitting her.
TRIANGLE
You’re not using…
HEXAGON
Handheld explosives! Smart, right?!
RECTANGLE
(at the top of the mountain watching the race)
Wait, Mr. Host guy, is that allowed?
HOST
Well technically I never said it WASN’T allowed, so I guess it’s allowed!
TRIANGLE
H-Hey, this probably isn’t allowed!
HOST
(from the starting line)
It is allowed!
Triangle looks distraught by this information and takes a frightened peek at Hexagon, and she has a plethora of handheld explosives in her hands, ready to be thrown.
TRIANGLE
Oh no.
Triangle is absolutely bombarded by different bombs, even a water balloon at some point. However, she can only dodge for so long, and gets hit by an old-fashioned black powder mortar bomb. There’s a big explosion and Triangle gets farther and farther away from Hexagon as she sprints down the mountain, knowing that she has succeeded.
Triangle wakes up for just a moment, dazed.
TRIANGLE
(sounding intoxicated)
Hey… This isn’t fair…
Triangle plops to the ground again, now fully unconscious (like Circle lol).
Hexagon crosses the finish line and looks back at the bombing site (including Triangle).
HEXAGON
(talking to Triangle like she can listen)
Heh. Sorry, but you gotta do what you gotta do.
EXT. SNOW-CAPPED MOUNTAIN - DAY
HOST
So last but not least, we got-
RECTANGLE
Yeah yeah, we know! Let’s go, Square!
HOST
Okay then, line up at the start! Go when you’re ready!
The last pair lines up at the start.
RECTANGLE
Well Square, the Host guy said that we could go whenever we want!
SQUARE
(quietly)
Uh, yeah!
Rectangle waits for Square to start going.
RECTANGLE
You gonna go, sis?
SQUARE
Well, uh, it’s just kinda high, you know?
RECTANGLE
Oh come on, since when were you afraid of heights?
SQUARE
Uh…
RECTANGLE
(happily)
Come on Square, just go!
SQUARE
What?
RECTANGLE
I said…
Rectangle grabs Square and prepares to… fling her???
RECTANGLE
(confident, loud)
COME ON SQUARE, JUST GO!!!
Rectangle throws Square in the direction of the finish line. Square shrieks as she thrusts through the air.
Square hits the finish line at such a force that makes her body dig into the ground at a certain extent.
RECTANGLE
(at the top of the mountain)
Woohoo! I knew you could do it!
Host looks confused.
HOST
Well there’s no point being up here, let’s get down!
Host snaps his fingers and it magically teleports him and Rectangle down to the rest of the crowd, at the finish line. Rectangle looks shocked.
RECTANGLE
(shocked)
Wh- DID YOU JUST TELEPORT US?!
HOST
(talking to the rest of the crowd)
What? Do you guys not do that?
PENTAGON
Wow! That was incredible!
HOST
Uh… now it’s time to vote for you guys to vote!
As Host announces the names of the contestants up for elimination, the camera focuses on each of them.
HOST
If you need a reminder, the contestants up for elimination are Circle, Octagon, Oval, Triangle, and Rectangle! Now go over to this conveniently placed booth to enter your vote! Or… At least the ones that are still conscious.
INT. VOTING BOOTH - SUNSET
Below are individual “confessionals” in the voting booth.
RHOMBUS
That Octagon just has to go! It’s not really taking out the competition, because he provides NO competition! Haha!
HEXAGON
Circle’s just so full of himself! Sure, he’s an… okay teacher, but it was just so annoying to see him gloat about being an “adult and qualified teacher”.
TRAPEZOID
(silence)
RECTANGLE
Oval’s too quiet, too devoid of energy! Sure he’s nice, but I can’t deal with that depressing voice anymore!
EXT. VOTING BOOTH - SUNSET
Square steps out of the voting booth, being the last voter.
HOST
Okay, so I’m guessing everyone has voted, so I’m just going to…
Host’s arm stretches and reaches into the voting booth. His arm comes out with a handful of papers (with votes on them).
HOST
Before I start reading the votes, I would like to spice it up with another neat invention!
Host pulls out another screen invention. It’s called the SCREEN-O-TRON 5000.
HOST
This is a straight of the art screen. It can solve all your display problems, it can even solve your relationsh-
HEXAGON
We get it! But wait, isn’t this just a knockoff randomizer screen?
HOST
What? No! This is completely different from the RANDOMIZER-2000!
HEXAGON
Yeah. Okay.
HOST
Anyways, I’ll read the votes and a graph will appear on the screen as I read them!
PENTAGON
Ooh! I can’t wait to see the votes!
OVAL
You know these are votes to eliminate someone, right?
PENTAGON
What.
HOST
I’ll read the votes now!
Oooh… The suspense!
HOST
First vote, Circle.
While Host reads them, he also flips them, showing them to the contestants.
HOST
Second vote, Octagon.
HOST
Third vote, Circle, again.
HOST
Fourth vote, Octagon, again! Circle and Octagon are tied with 2 votes each! Four votes left.
HOST
Fifth vote, Oval.
PENTAGON
(nonchalantly)
That was mine!
OCTAGON
(to Pentagon)
Shh!
PENTAGON
(whispering)
Sorry!
HOST
Sixth vote, Octagon.
Octagon looks concerned.
HOST
Seventh vote, Circle. Octagon and Circle are tied with 3 votes each. One vote left–will this be a tiebreaker?
Both Circle and Octagon are frightened.
HOST
And the first one eliminated from the game, not gaining control of all the Shapelands is…
Dramatic camera shots and music before the last vote is announced.
HOST
Circle. I’m sorry, but you’ve been eliminated- Wait, Circle is still up there at the rock he crashed into! Let’s go and tell him the bad news.
Rhombus
More like good news! Imagine being eliminated first, like, I could never-
OCTAGON
Oh shut up.
RECTANGLE
Hey, Square, are you okay?
Square keeps walking next to Rectangle but is silent.
RECTANGLE
I may have gone a bit overboard there. At least you got immunity though!
SQUARE
(soft, depressing)
Yeah.
RECTANGLE
(humbly)
I’m sorry.
The gang finished walking up to where Circle got hit. The camera switches to a first-person POV of Circle as he wakes up.
CIRCLE
Huh? Where am I? Wh- Why are all of you here, and uh, looking at me..?
HOST
I’m sorry Circle, but you’ve been eliminated. It was a close vote though.
Circle stands up and brushes himself off.
CIRCLE
(apologetically)
I may have been a bit cocky there… I should have known, since I am, of course, an adult and qualified teacher.
RHOMBUS
Please just stop talking.
CIRCLE
… So where do I go now? Do I get sent home or..?
HOST
Oh, you’ll see.
Host dramatically claps, which makes Circle fall unconscious (he was alive for like a moment lol).
PENTAGON
(shocked)
Woah! What did you do to him?!
HOST
Don’t worry, he’s just fallen into a coma. I’ll wake him from his coma once the game is complete!
PENTAGON
You’re not going to just leave him here, are you?
HOST
Don’t worry, once I snap my fingers, he’ll be transported to the local hospital where he’ll safely rest!
TRIANGLE
Phew. I thought you killed him or something!
HOST
Of course not! I’m not a monster!
Host snaps his fingers and Circle teleports to Hilly Hospital.
HOST
Well, with that being said, our next contest will start tomorrow. For now, I’ll just watch this beautiful meteor shower.
It turns out that a meteor shower is taking place right above them. The gang sits altogether and watches the meteor shower.
Shapeoff 1: “A Rocky Start”
Written by Timothy Stepanus
Co-Written by Colton T. BOZO